photo by jamie nyc |
Recently, my husband asked me why breasts are often featured in my posts. Of course, since he is male and is differently-equipped, he's clueless.
When I was in junior high and my breasts developed on my then-thin frame, they were a pain in the rear. Being a tomboy, I lived in chambray shirts and jeans, or overalls. My true desire was to wear bright red or rainbow-colored suspenders, but being extra-endowed proved problematic. Should the suspenders be worn right over the middle of each breast, or shove them off to either side? Thinking they looked stupid on my figure, I (sadly) did not wear them.
In my late teens and early 20's, I developed an appreciation for my breasts; as a waitress, I could use them to my advantage. Leaning over a bit--for leering purposes--when serving a businessman or a drunk truck driver could bring in extra-large tips. However, sometimes I had to get a customer's eye contact back to my eyes so I could get their order. (They were easily hypnotized or not too bright--maybe they thought they were in a drive-through and my breasts were speakers...I'm not sure what their problem was.)
Now in my 50's, I've discovered how versatile my breasts are. Patricia Heaton (the actress that played Ray Romano's wife on Everybody Loves Raymond) once spoke quite candidly about the breast augmentation she had done. She said before the surgery, it was like an origami project putting on a bra---folding each breast multiple times to get it in. So there's one way they serve a purpose: as a free rainy-day activity.
They can also be leg warmers during cold weather. If you flip them up over your shoulder and around your neck, they can be neck warmers.
So yes, I did not appreciate or like my breasts when I was young, but now I've gotten quite attached to them. And if you have other ways they are versatile, feel free to send them my way.