Luckily, I was right behind Linda O'Connell, so we spent the hour chatting. (Of course, while we stood there, loitering, Linda tapped out 7 Chicken Soup for the Soul stories, submitted them, and got 3 acceptance emails. I did not use my time as constructively, and only succeeded in giving the stink-eye to the hoity-toities as they sashayed ahead of us to enjoy their preferential seating. "Botox-filled line-butters," I hissed at them.)
Lamott and Lamott were enchanting. Anne began by saying several times, "I am not going to say one word about Cheney's heart transplant. Not one word. My lips are zippered shut."
She said when Sam and Amy (the mother of Jax, Anne's grandson) fell in love, Sam informed his mother that Amy was moving into his apartment, but reassured his mom that she was going to sleep on the couch. Anne said, "Yeah, right. Sure," and then told us, "That lasted until 2:34 that afternoon."
Sam told a funny story about when his son Jax was a newborn. When the baby's umbilical cord stump fell off, the young father was convinced that Jax had clawed a hole into his own stomach with his too-long tiny fingernails, because his large intestine was clearly visible from where the stump fell off. They rushed him to the emergency room; of course, there was no gaping wound, it was just a dad needlessly going from 0 to panic in 0.3 seconds.
Anne said she shows up every day to write. She reminded us that the muse is not going to hunt us down. We have to place our butts in the chair.
There were a few video clips I took. I apologized beforehand for the shakiness; I was experiencing the DT's. (I was in desperate need of a Bolthouse Farms Vanilla Chai Tea, the breakfast of champions/Fireblossom.) However, somehow they were rendered unviewable, after a couple of people were able to watch them. (If anyone with expertise can help me, please do so. When people would click on the videos, a message that said, "This video is currently unavailable Please try later.")
