Questions to Ponder...

         This evening on the radio (heard while I was hurtling down the highway) a horrific tidbit spewed out over the airwaves.

         Ladies, please pay close attention. This information will change life as you know it:

If you are size 8 or larger, you are "plus size." *
                                                   * (according to the fashion industry)

         So, while you are wallowing in a mixing bowl full of ice cream, followed by a mashed potato chaser, here's something else to add to the depressing funk.

          Check out the back label of the granny panties you're wearing. What size is it?

        The underwear I wear is labeled XL (or "grande."  Do they think that makes it more "festive" and fun?).

         Now, most of my blogging buddies have not seen what I look like but trust me, I have a big butt.  It's not big in the Jennifer Lopez-Beyonce way.  It's big in more of the slow moving-truck-hogging-up-the-highway-with-its-wide-load-sign way.  It's flat and broad. 

photo by flickrway

       Every time I see that "XL" inked onto the back of my bloomers, it makes me wonder.  Yes, I know my rear has spread in a cellulite version of imminent domain, but I know there are lots of rears that are larger than mine.  Lots.  (Just watch Jerry Springer to see some especially fine specimens.)

        And that's when I start wondering.  Underwear has a number size (I'm not telling you the number that I wear) as well as the "XL/Grande." What do the larger sizes say if my butt (a median butt, with an extra dollop or two thrown in) is "Grande"? 

           And when did we start viewing women that are a size 8 as huge?
       

Mad Talking, Soft Talking, Fast Talking

           Just after reading the first forty or so pages of Writers at Play by Mary Adler, I'm already hooked.  In the first chapter, it advocates providing opportunities for young writers to "play" with words, while balancing their need for a bit of structure and focus.

           Adler includes an exercise from a book called Inside Out. It seems like it would be a great activity to do if you want to get a handle on a character, and could be part of the work at the backend, or could even be expanded to become a short piece that stands on its own.

photo by DoodleDancer

               "Mad Talking---Write a response to a person, thing or situation that makes the character angry.

              Soft Talking---Write so that the character comforts a suffering person or thing (an animal, a stuffed animal, even an inanimate object, such as an old car).

              Fast Talking---Write to convince someone to do something or believe something. Have the character win them over."
  
                                                                       ---Mary Adler

              Try writing a "talking" piece about a character. You might be surprised at the  results...

               And thanks to my newest follower, Val Thevictorian. Val, if you are a blogger, let me know, and I'll include a link.  (I love your icon---if that's the correct term.)

An Affair With an Author

       Recently my friend Becky Povich wrote in her blog about the letters she has written to various authors.  She has even gotten replies.  I asked her who had written back: she kept mum.  I momentarily thought about replying about my affair with a writer, but thought it would be better to speak about it in a post...

      Years ago, I fell for George R. R. Martin.  His book Fevre Dream is such a gem: vampires meet the river boat trade of the 18oo's.  The plot is engaging, and the book became one of my favorites.

        When he came to St. Louis several years ago for a book signing/groupie gathering, I was there, ready. In my hands was my copy of Fevre Dream; everyone else had one of his sucky popular "fantasy" novels.  No one else in the room knew Martin as well as I did, they were unaware of his wonderful touch, otherwise they would not have been clamoring for the uninspired drivel that they lapped up. 

Kurt Sutter
photo by Himes Images

     When I stood up and proclaimed my love for Fevre Dream, in front of all the gaping onlookers, our eyes met. George saw a spark, from across the crowded room he knew we were kindred spirits, but I was too timid to make any further overtures and George...well, George could not suggest, surrounded by book purchasers, that we drive off into the sunset together.  Alas, I only had my old, worn copy (Fevre Dream was out of print for a while) and I was unwilling to shell out money for crap his recent tale so I could nab a line ticket to get his autograph.  $24.99 was all that stood between Martin and I consummating our connection.

     A few years later, I became bolder. I was at a teacher's conference and heard Rick Bragg speak about his memoir All Over But the Shoutin'.  Although I was happily married and in spite of the fact that I was sitting next to my very proper Mormon friend, I fell hard. He told poignant stories, he told hilarious tales, and it was clear no one else in the banquet hall knew him as I did.  I stalked him for years after that...devoured Ava's Man and later sobbed, when he broke it off with me in The Prince of Frogtown.  He had found another lover and married her; my heart was shattered...

        Now my sights are on someone else. Again, a writer.  This man has the ability to paint characters that are so dark (to most people's morality) yet so complex and so infused with their own "light."  This past season, he even wrote of a devoted father who traveled to Ireland to save his son as well as hunt down the man who kidnapped the little boy.  When this father spied on the couple that had "adopted" the baby, he walked away...this child now had a chance at a life free from violence and as heart-wrenching as the decision was, he knew it was the greatest act of love he could perform.  

       Kurt Sutter. I've got you in my cross-hairs. When you tire of Katey Sagal, I'll be waiting for you...

     And thank you to my newest follower, Fireblossom.  If you have not read her poetry, sit down first (otherwise you will topple over when she blows you away) and then enjoy.

    Also, one of my blogging buddies, Linda O'Connell is hovering close---but not quite---to 100 followers.  She's a serious freelancer and has millions of publishing credits (only a slight exaggeration) and is generous with her talent and knowledge.  Perhaps you will be the one to put her into the triple digits...





  

Joan of Arc

          Recently I was reminded of my "saint phase" by one of Donna Volkenannt's posts.  (By the way, you will not find a more generous blogger than Donna when it comes to contests and calls for submissions.  And she's nearing 100 followers...Perhaps you will be the one to help her reach that milestone?)

        Not a Catholic, I nonetheless scoured the bookmobile for books about saints, had the delusion I could become a saint...I've since figured out it was my pixie haircut, my tomboy ways, my fondness for rocking the boat (as opposed to a saint-like life) that resulted in this phase.

photo by Saint Joan of Arc Superstar

       But Joan of Arc appeared again! 'Tis Kismet! If you have never read Fireblossom's poetry, you will be blown away when you partake. Her poem posted on Friday, February 4 is called "Orleans" and it is delightful mix of the sacred ancient and the shallow present.  (I also went through a Rod McKuen phase, so this poem is a doubly delicious.) 

       Take the time to go back into her archives and read some of her work. There is something (Ithink) for everyone...

A Writing "Block"

         I just read the latest post on WOW, and it's jam-packed with ideas from Jodi Webb.  One tip that's visual and simple is the use of blocks.  You know, the toddler kind with letters and numbers on them...

photo by porter867-5309

        

          Jodi has 8 blocks on her desk, and every time she sends out a query, she takes a block away.  The goal is to get rid of all 8 blocks by the end of the week.

          I am in the midst of decluttering our spare bedroom. Hopefully when I am done, it will be a decent writing space. I have a few things to jazz it up already--my first rejection letter, framed (and it's a real letter, not some simple, short form), some of my favorite photos, and a special writer's box that was given to me by a friend after I got the news that my children's book is going to be published. 

       The visual factor...the idea of starting with a number of blocks and gradually, the number dwindles...It's like mirroring the battle against writer's block. As the week goes on, as the queries and submissions are sent out, the block(s) diminishes.  

        I am not sure I am ready for 8 blocks (I teach during the day), but perhaps 4 or 5.  Maybe I can even pick and choose the blocks, so I can start each week out with the blocks below?

                 S      E     N     D



      And welcome to my newest follower, WORDS  A  DAY  and her blog.  She is a writer and (I think) a painter. Thanks for checking out my blog!

Better-Than-Average Bathroom Graffitti

          If you read Pearl's blog, today's is inspiring. At least to SDs like me. (The "D" stands for disturber. You can figure out for yourself what the "S" stands for.)

         In her post today, she writes about a certain someone at work who has started taping interesting, quirky notes in the staff restroom. They started out very basic but apparently, quickly veered into thought-provoking or downright funny.  Here are a couple she included:

   "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this---ever!

                                                                           and

                             Perhaps it's time you lowered your expectations.

photo by Storvo, Inc.

          Where I work we have a staff bathroom/restroom/toilet.  I would love to start a "phantom posting" project.  And, I would love your assistance.

            Please send in any quotes or statements that would make good bathroom reading.  I am in the mood to do some major disturbing...