The Pyrenees---Southern France

The Pyrenees---Southern France

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Breasts: Can't Live With 'Em, Can't Live Without 'Em

photo by jamie nyc
          Recently, my husband asked me why breasts are often featured in my posts. Of course, since he is male and is differently-equipped, he's clueless.

         When I was in junior high and my breasts developed on my then-thin frame, they were a pain in the rear. Being a tomboy, I lived in chambray shirts and jeans, or overalls. My true desire was to wear bright red or rainbow-colored suspenders, but being extra-endowed proved problematic. Should the suspenders be worn right over the middle of each breast, or shove them off to either side?  Thinking they looked stupid on my figure, I (sadly) did not wear them.

       In my late teens and early 20's, I developed an appreciation for my breasts; as a waitress, I could use them to my advantage. Leaning over a bit--for leering purposes--when serving a businessman or a drunk truck driver could bring in extra-large tips. However, sometimes I had to get a customer's eye contact back to my eyes so I could get their order. (They were easily hypnotized or not too bright--maybe they thought they were in a drive-through and my breasts were speakers...I'm not sure what their problem was.)

       Now in my 50's, I've discovered how versatile my breasts are. Patricia Heaton (the actress that played Ray Romano's wife on Everybody Loves Raymond) once spoke quite candidly about the breast augmentation she had done. She said before the surgery, it was like an origami project putting on a bra---folding each breast multiple times to get it in. So there's one way they serve a purpose: as a free rainy-day activity.

       They can also be leg warmers during cold weather. If you flip them up over your shoulder and around your neck, they can be neck warmers.

        So yes, I did not appreciate or like my breasts when I was young, but now I've gotten quite attached to them. And if you have other ways they are versatile, feel free to send them my way.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Constructing and Deconstructing

photo by Lightning Lee
(Maybe he gets all the words right the first time...)
       I'm working on a piece that needs lot of tearing apart (the crappy parts) and  a great deal of building up (the weaker and the fairly-decent parts).

      One of the "Donalds" (Graves or Murray, I can remember which) said that writing is "as much deconstruction as construction." He claims that we spend as much time scratching out and deleting as we do actually writing.  

      What is it about the revising process that you love? Or perhaps it's a relationship filled with pure venom? In that case, what is it about revising that you hate?