If They're White, They Ain't Right (And Darn It Again, Fireblossom!)

        I've started choosing my friends more carefully.  I mean, I'm at the age where I should pick and choose with more discrimination.  Sometimes my friends are unkind.  Sometimes they do damage. In fact, the friends I have chosen in the past have been cruel and cunning.

        So from now on, I am choosing my friends by their color. And I'm only looking for friends who are brown. Because my white friends have helped me make a mess of my life.

         My mantra has become what I titled this post:  "White ain't right!"

         Now don't get me wrong.  The white friends from my past have not abandoned me. On the contrary, they have stuck by me through thick and through...well, they've refused to leave.  In most cases, that would be admirable. But not in my case. Because I would like for them to go away, yet they continue to hang around. These friends think they are a comfort for me, a buffer against the rest of the world. What they don't know is they are making things worse for me... 

         In January I went to my first Overeaters Anonymous meeting. I'm not a religious person, so I was skeptical. I hate to ask for help from anybody, so I had my eyes all stubbornly squinted up. And I have so far avoided selling Amway/becoming a scrapbooking zombie/ending up in an auditorium full of people chanting "See it! Believe it! Achieve it!" so I was sure that I would not fit in.

       But after that first meeting, I went back the next week, and the week after that and the week after that. And it seems to work, even with a heathen like me.

       I won't go into the specifics---because it would not interest anyone (and perhaps this whole post is boring to you)---but I have started to avoid foods that are white.  And they have indeed been "friends" for decades...

photo by Wasabi Bratwurst

                  Mashed potatoes...With butter or gravy.  I used to make a meal out of mashed potatoes.  It wasn't that I ate a whole potful of them, but there were many occasions when I would eat nothing but a serving (or two) of mashed potatoes.

                  White bread, like yeast rolls and King's Hawaiian Bread...Bread and pasta---my favorite things in the world.  And although I have never liked white bread like Wonder Bread (just a bunch of air, in my opinion), I love homemade white bread and any kind of noodles or pasta.

photo by Tornado Chaser

                What I've discovered is my body takes in white bread/rice/potatoes and converts it into my all-time favorite food group:  Sugar.  Because along with compulsively and impulsively eating bread and potatoes, I was also out-of-control with chocolate and other desserts.  And the more I eat, the more I want to eat.

               Now most people can eat a couple of chocolate chip cookies and they're fine.  The majority of folks can eat a croissant and they're satisfied. I'm not like that. One is too much and 6 or 7 or 8 cookies is not enough...

              So I'm slowly changing the way I look at food.  I plan what I eat every day.  I've discovered that fried sweet potatoes and onions are delicious. I'm taking pleasure in eating whole grain breads. And I'm trying to be mindful when it comes to food.

photo of Ezekiel Bread by traui
This is a whole grain bread, has no sugar, and can be
found at Dierbergs (in the freezer section in the "health food" aisle)
but it's cheaper at Trader Joe's. (Keep it in your freezer.)

             So when I say, "No, thanks," to some dessert, when I bring my own lunch to a meeting and it looks weird, when I avoid the crackers and dip at a get-together, it's because I'm trying to change my way of thinking.

           And all my white "friends" who---millions of times---I've turned to in the past:  I don't want you around no more....   

And to those who have not found Fireblossom's blog...Check out her poem "An Edifying Fable" posted today.  It was prompted by the photo at another site. You have to page down to find the picture prompt challenge...