Where I'm Going and Back-of-the-Book Blurb # 102

Oh, don't get excited. This summer I'm not going to Turkey (again)/France (I wish)/stalk Viggo Mortensen (any more). I'm not going to quit blogging. (Sorry!) The place I'm going this summer is into my head and on paper.

I recently served up my beautiful baby manuscript to an editor I hired. The pregnancy lasted a couple of years. It was a C-section--that baby was stuck and didn't want to come out. When it was finally delivered, I thought my stack of papers was ab. So. Lute. Ly. perfect.

However, Margo Dill didn't score my baby a perfect 10. (Gasp!) There were problems. Major problems. However, they were fixable problems... and Margo has given me a handbook to ensure I raise this baby up right until it can toddle off on its own.

To be completely honest, I was not thrilled with hiring an editor. I'd heard from writing friends how good Margo was, but really... What was she going to tell me that I didn't already know? It's brilliant? It's engaging? I already knew that. (Ha!)

Margo honed in on the strengths and the weaknesses of my manuscript with the accuracy of a laser. As soon as I read her thorough and detailed critique, I knew she was right.

So, this summer I'm headed off to more research... lots of writing and lots of revising... and I'm so excited. Margo's specific suggestions have energized me and encouraged me to make this story the best one it can be.

If you'd like to read about some of her suggestions and get an idea of how eagle-eyed she is when it comes to editing, check out my post on The Muffin. 



And now onto back-of-the-book blurb stuff...

          Look at the photo below. That is the cover of your book. You choose the genre. Is it a coffee table book on why Speedos and skimpy suits for men are bad fashion choices? Is it a photo collection of deranged old men? You decide.

        Write an enticing blurb--150 words or less. (The title doesn't count in the word count.) Blurbs are those enticing bits that prod you into buying the book. Sometimes they're on the back cover of the book. Sometimes they're on the inside front cover. What they always try to do is lure you into purchasing the book. 

          

          Lisa Ricard Claro was the original creator of this writing challenge. She moved to Florida, and is too busy to host a weekly book blurb. Check out her blog, along with her books. Anything she writes is wonderful, and not only is she a gifted writer, she's also a generous friend. She has several new books in the works, and that, along with walking the beach on a daily basis, fills up her days.

     

          Include your blurb in a blog post. Include a link to this post. Also, link your post to Mr. Linky. Mr. Linky is easy. If you've never done it, you'll be impressed with how simple he is. And then, check out the other blurb(s). It's interesting to see the different directions writers take, given the same photo.

           Here's the book cover, along with my blurb:

Marcia had gotten rid of her man. All he did every evening was watch Swamp People (a show that provided a translating caption for viewers, even though the stars supposedly were speaking English).

“Shootem, Libeth. Shootem!” fill the void between them every night.

Now that Barney was out of her hair, it was time for his left-over junk to go as well, so Marcia Magic marked up a big sign. She dragged the stuff out to her front yard. And she waited for the cars to drive up, stop and unload… because (she hoped) the stuff was too good to pass up.

Stuff like a complete set of dribble glasses… a Lost in Space chess set… a Miami Vice (signed) poster… a miniature Ice Road Truckers truck.

Will Marcia make money from this left-over junk? Or, will she make Goodwill happy when she carts the unbought stuff over to them? (150 words)

And if you want to play next week (because I've finally gotten my rear end back on track), here is the next photo/book cover:

I'm Baaaack

I'm not going to look at when I posted last, because it would be embarrassing. It was more than days ago, but I'm hoping it was weeks and not months.

I've been busy. (Uh oh. Here comes the string of excuses.) My son graduated from med school in May. It was a 3-hour drive to the ceremony, and ended up being a delightful family gathering. He also turned 30 this month, which is hard to believe, I know, since I am only 42. Okay, 52. Well, not 62... at least not yet. 

My son's the one in the middle.

But the big news is I hired an editor to give me some feedback on my manuscript. It was quite an experience. I'll be sharing who the editor was and how they stopped me from writing on Friday--or you can check out my post on The Muffin this Thursday, because I'm going to tell all then as well.

The end of the school year was hectic (more whining) and I'm still not finished. (In fact, I'm writing this post to procrastinate a bit when it comes to my report cards.)

This month I took my granddaughter to see Phantom of the Opera. (It was the best Phantom I've ever seen.)

Sadly, I've missed out on some wonderful posts, because in the time frame when I was absent from the blogosphere, I haven't read any blogs. There's no way I can backtrack and read all the news I've missed. Sooo... Do you have any huge news? Did you get a bunch of stories/manuscripts accepted? Because the empty nest is such a sad place, have you found yourself (Surprise!) pregnant? (I'm talkin' to you, Val.) If you have some juicy tidbits to share that I missed, due to my slothlike blogging habits, please note them in your comment.  

Dog Stuff, Turkey Stuff and Back-of-the-Book Blurb # 100

For the past week we've been fostering Sasha (who will be Bella in couple of weeks, when she's adopted). This sweet golden mix is getting used to being a pet. She's never been in a house before, and has not yet had a single accident. We tried putting her in a crate when we were at work, but that only lasted a few hours... My husband came home at noon and found her shaking with fear, and let her out. She hasn't chewed anything, and is (so far) not letting Radar aggravate her too much.

This is Sasha (Bella) in the foreground, in our combination living room-dining room-
entertainment center-family room.

This is Sasha when we first saw her. She had a hole dug into the dirt
next to the house where a family was looking after her.

This is Sasha (Bella) on the porch of our Turkish friends.

I posted a bit about my trip to Turkey, so if you'd like to find out how I ate my way across the country, from Istanbul to Gomec, check out my piece.

And now, onto book blurb stuff (and yes, I skipped the 99th one due to my travels).

And now, onto back-of-the-book blurb business. Look at the photo below. That is the cover of your book. You choose the genre. Is it a coffee table book on why Speedos and skimpy suits for men are bad fashion choices? Is it a photo collection of deranged old men? You decide.

        Write an enticing blurb--150 words or less. (The title doesn't count in the word count.) Blurbs are those enticing bits that prod you into buying the book. Sometimes they're on the back cover of the book. Sometimes they're on the inside front cover. What they always try to do is lure you into purchasing the book. 

          Lisa Ricard Claro was the original creator of this writing challenge. She moved to Florida, and is too busy to host a weekly book blurb. Check out her blog, along with her books. Anything she writes is wonderful, and not only is she a gifted writer, she's also a generous friend.

     

          Include your blurb in a blog post. Include a link to this post. Also, link your post to Mr. Linky. Mr. Linky is easy. If you've never done it, you'll be impressed with how simple he is. And then, check out the other blurb(s). It's interesting to see the different directions writers take, given the same photo.

           Here's the book cover, along with my blurb:

Club Dead-No-More

Henry was stuck in what his kids thought was a wonderful resort-style senior citizen community. Club Dead. His daughter loved the show The Walking Dead and fell in love with the place just because of the name.

Yeah, there's somebody taken away in a slow-moving ambulance every week, but Henry's determined it's not him... at least not for a while.

Spending his days sunning on the beach is boring, until he opened one of the abandoned oil drums. Floating in a green liquid was a baggie full of blue pills.

After taking one, Henry discovered an alertness he'd been missing for decades. Suddenly parts of him were attentive that had been slumbering for so long. 

Henry's sudden zest for life, combined with the botox-ed beach biddies who were so pumped with silicone they could be used for life rafts... well, let's just say the beach is now a busier place. (150 words)

For those who are curious, what Lisa Ricard Claro promised to happen did happen. After doing a hundred of these blurbs--even if they're silly and not for real blurbs--they've gotten easier. And for those who'd like to play along, here is the photo for the next back-of-the-book blurb:

Traveling Turkish-Style, Being "Too Cool" Results in Being Cold and 6-Word Memoirs

I got back this weekend from Turkey. I saw lovely countryside, ate delicious food and we ended up bringing back four golden retrievers. I'll write more about the dogs on Friday, and tell about a dog we rescued while I was there--her name (for now) is SueJan (named after the other Love a Golden volunteer who traveled with me, and me... Yeah, I know, but "SiouxJan" would be too hard to verbally navigate).

This is Danny, one of the goldens we brought from Turkey to
Chicago and then to St. Louis. Our flight from Istanbul got in late
on Thursday night, so we spent the night at La Quinta, which is a
dog-friendly chain. Each of us had 2 dogs in our room. Danny is
used to sleeping in a bed since he was rescued in January, and
has been spoiled (as all dogs should be) by his Turkish foster mom.

I brought clothes that could be hand washed and hung up or laid out to dry, since I was going to be in Turkey a week and I was only bringing a small carry-on bag. I didn't need no stinkin' coat or jacket. I was going to a warm country, after all.

That is me on the right. We're in Aya Sofya,
a church (now a museum) built in 400-something AD.

Well, one evening in Gomec (a small town about 5 hours from Istanbul) I had to borrow a hoodie. It was a bit too cool. Other than that, I was fine with my lack out outerwear...

... until we got to Chicago. It was snowing. And in the 30s. And blustery. When we stopped to let the dogs out, midway, on our car trip to St. Louis, I was bare-legged (with a skirt) and had only a t-shirt and long-sleeved shirt over it. Both Jan and I begged the dogs to quickly pee and poop. They weren't completely cooperative, but I can't blame them. They'd been cooped up crates and were thrilled to be able to walk around and sniff. 

 Here's a 6-word memoir that pays homage to my favorite kind of shoe--especially when traveling.

Hose off Crocs... They're good again. 

Here is one about a delicious dessert we had. Some of their food was so rich, it wreaked havoc on our digestive system. One of our hosts called helva a "bomb" due to its richness. My stomach agreed... and yet I still could not resist.

Helva: heavenly-tasting, hell on intestines

How about you? When did you pack for a trip in a way that caused you regret? What foreign food can you not stay away from? Curious minds (like mine) want to know. 

A Break & a Marvelous Movie...Back-of-the-Book Blurb # 98... and a Scary Writing Critique Group Meeting

     My Spring Break begins in a few days. It will be delightful to have some time off, but I won't be lounging around watching TV and eating bonbons. I'm going on another quick trip to Turkey to rescue some golden retrievers. Pray for the passengers in the plane, that I don't fall asleep and snore during the flight.

       Also, I got to see the movie The Darkest Hour. It was wonderful. Gary Oldman did a fabulous job as Churchill. The film made me want to read his memoir (if he has one) or a decent biography about his life.     

And now, onto back-of-the-book blurb business. Look at the photo below. That is the cover of your book. You choose the genre. Is it a coffee table book on meditation positions? Is it a photo collection of mentally-ill patients and where they choose to sit? You decide.

        Write an enticing blurb--150 words or less. (The title doesn't count in the word count.) Blurbs are those enticing bits that prod you into buying the book. Sometimes they're on the back cover of the book. Sometimes they're on the inside front cover. What they always try to do is lure you into purchasing the book. 

          Lisa Ricard Claro was the original creator of this writing challenge. She moved to Florida, and is too busy to host a weekly book blurb. If you'd like to read my review of The Write Man, Lisa's most recent novel, you read it here.  Lisa nudged me into reading her first romance novel... and then I read the next two in the series. She's that good of a writer.

     

          Include your blurb in a blog post. Include a link to this post. Also, link your post to Mr. Linky. Mr. Linky is easy. If you've never done it, you'll be impressed with how simple he is. And then, check out the other blurb(s). It's interesting to see the different directions writers take, given the same photo.

           Here's the book cover, along with my blurb:

The Cure for Crazy

     Mrs. Higginbottam still loved teaching, even after 49 years. When the teachers around her had smarboards and computers, she still had her trusty green blackboards and a paper gradebook. Those things never failed!
      Her students thought their teacher was whackadoodle. If they whispered, Mrs. H shuffled up and down the aisles and yelled. If they laughed, her face turned beet-red and she'd stomp her feet and twirl around like the cartoon Tasmanian Devil. When the teacher wasn't lecturing the class, the kids were hunched over their desks furiously working.
       The kids were stressed out. Some of the kids started biting their nails down to the quick. Some started pulling out patches of their hair. Some started muttering under their breath.
        After one of the kids saw his mom meditate, a light bulb lit up. Maybe some mantra-muttering would make them calmer? But would Mrs. Higginbottam let them do it? (150 words)



      Plus, something weird happened at this week's writing critique group meeting. I always hope that everyone's opinion of my piece is favorable. Nobody wants to hear five other people say, "That story stunk!" However, I don't get nervous as the group reads my work. If they don't laugh at the funny parts or understand the story, that just means I have to do more revising.

    But this week I shared a synopsis I've been working on. It's for a manuscript I've worked on for more than a year. The piece means a lot to me. 

     As they read, I almost snatched it out of their hands and said, "It's not ready to share yet," I was that anxious.

     It's crazy when our writing makes us crazy.

And Val, here is the photo for the next back-of-the-book blurb:

      
       

Been Downtown...Turkey Bound... and Six-Word Memoirs

On Saturday I marched downtown with a couple friends and 10,000 others. because I'm a teacher, I've had to go through "active shooter" training. On my classroom door is a floor deadbolt lock that if activated, would prevent the door from opening for an intruder. I've been through countless "intruder drills."

Something has to stop the mass-shootings. I'm hoping the young people can make less of a mess of the world than we did.

At the march I saw senior citizens all the way to stroller babies. People of all races and all generations came together to say, "No more." I saw many wonderful signs, some of which I cannot post. I don't want to lose my job, and I know my students are always trolling the internet looking for signs of me. If you'd like to see my favorite one, send me an email. Warning: It is a bit "colorful"...

However, here are few I especially liked:

photo by Sioux

photo by Sioux

photo by Sioux

I did not take this picture--it was from the Philadelphia march--
but I did see a few "Now You've Pissed Off Grandma" signs at the St. Louis march.

       Soon I will be returning to Turkey to rescue 3 or 4 golden retrievers. Pray (for the people around me) that I get an aisle seat, since I get up frequently during long flights. 

       Here are a couple of six-word memoirs that indicate what I've been up to over the weekend:

Vegging out on movies... so lazy.
(I saw The Darkest Hour recently, along with The Shape of Water and The Greatest Showman. I enjoyed each one immensely.)

Life or greed--which matters most?