She'd blog if she remembered,
But last night a puddle of drool
Reminded her that hormones still rule!
She got up this morning, glanced in the mirror
and screamed without warning...
Her mustache hairs had gone wild---
They were white and wiry and looked riled
up. "Why is aging so rough?
My breasts have grown long enough!
This Christmas season, I want no jewels,
Nor do I want any kitchen tools.
No chic, new, stylish clothes
Or even cute socks that warm my toes.
Instead I'd like a fleet of personal trainers---
And who would they be? That's a no-brainer!
Viggo (Mortensen) to run with me across the plains,
Johnny (Depp), on his guitar he'd strum
While I thump on my belly like a big bass drum.
|photo of Johhny Depp by skittleydoo04|
|photo of Viggo Mortensen by Arnthor|
and Benecio (Del Toro) would teach me not to care--
Not being able to stop traffic with my looks
is less important that nibbling on chocolate while reading a great book.
|photo of Mark Harmon by nathfromfrance|
|photo of Benecio Del Toro by elezde|
So, this Christmas, all I want are my two front teeth
(to stay put, 'cause my gums are receding)
And a band of brave men--that's all that I'm needing..."